When I first considered the idea of donating my eggs to an anonymous couple, I really had no idea what I was in for. My process started in late 1998 when I was in the midst of a messy and complicated divorce. My girlfriend saw the center's ad in the paper and suggested it to me, only partly jokingly, as a way to offset mounting attorney's fees. At first I put the idea off. Quite honestly, I have always felt that there are so many unwanted children in this world already: Why can't these people adopt?

Then I remembered an old co-worker of mine. She was beautiful and had the seemingly perfect life… a great husband, a beautiful house, nice cars and plenty of money. The one thing that she wanted, but could not have, was a baby. She agonized as she grew closer to forty, and with two failed IVF attempts, she was also becoming depressed. Along with her depression came a bitterness toward others who were pregnant, including me. And although I resented her bitterness, I realized how important it must have been for her to have a baby.

Several years later, in 1997, and after having just gone through some major changes in my life, I began exploring the deeper meaning of the situation and what it would mean to another couple to have the chance to become pregnant. I called the center for more information and a few days later, I received a large packet of information. Along with a lot of intimidating information, was a questionnaire that I was to fill out if I was still interested in going through with the process.

If I had any doubts or fears before, they were certainly quelled as I went through the questionnaire. Of course the expected questions (hair and eye color, family health, etc.) were in the mix, but it was the questions about the broader base of life that made me realize how important this was. I have the two most beautiful children in the world, and I enjoyed my pregnancies and child birth experiences immensely.

You don't have to be a mother to donate, of course. The framing of the questions is extremely open-ended, so you're able to expound on anything that has great significance to you. But given the chance, I will take every opportunity to talk about how wonderful my kids are and what an amazing impact they have had on my life, so you can imagine how much I enjoyed this part!

Being a mother is the single most important thing in my life. It is the one thing I have always been certain about. It was in that instant, writing it down and knowing someone who felt the same way I did about being a parent was going to read this, that I felt the awesomeness of this decision. Filling out the questionnaire ended up being a cathartic experience for me… I was highly charged emotionally during the process.

Once I submitted my application, it wasn't long before I was contacted by the center to come in and do the preliminary blood work and physical. Then came the psychological testing and the meeting with the psychologist. Even though there were a lot of hoops to jump through (obviously they want to be careful), it was a relatively painless process. They were really good about getting me in and out of these appointments quickly, and fortunately because of their office hours, I was able to make them before work.

I think my profile was out for a week or so before I was contacted by the center with the news that I'd been selected by a recipient couple.

It took awhile from this point to move ahead. Several months, actually but every process is unique. In any case, we were finally ready to move ahead by late Spring in 1999, so I went to the office to meet with a donor nurse who showed me how to do the injections. Injections?!?!?!

At first, all I remembered were the needles and all the shots I was going to have to give myself. I was a little nervous (ok, I was freaking out actually), and wondered if I'd get through the whole cycle. Once I got home and sorted through everything, read all of the information about the drugs and possible side effects, and checked out all the needles and drugs, I felt better. It wasn't going to be that awful. I think I was just a little overwhelmed. The Lupron shots are nothing, and that's what I started with. Then, as I moved further into my cycle, I began the stimulating drugs which hurt a little, but even those weren't that bad.

After four weeks or so, however, I have to admit I was really ready to get the retrieval over with because I was tired of the shots. The day of the retrieval I met the surgical staff. They were very nice, which definitely helped ease my mind. The anesthesiologist did a wonderful job (I didn't remember a thing!) But I especially liked the fashionable foot covers they gave me to wear.

After the procedure I got very emotional (darn anesthesia). I cried when I thought about what was about to happen for this anonymous couple and I was really overjoyed for them. Just about then, my donor nurse came in with a gift and card from the recipient couple, which made me cry even more!

A few months later I donated a second time.

Within two months of my second retrieval, I was contacted to see if I wanted to donate again. In fact, I started my Lupron shots last night (three months after my last retrieval). This will be my third and final time to donate. I'm really glad I went through with the procedures. It's been a positive experience for me because it's helped me think outside my normal realm of consciousness. In a small way, and with the help of science, I've been able to contribute to the happiness of someone else. It's a miracle that this is medically possible, really.

One thing I have learned over the last year or so, is that if I've ever had questions, problems or concerns, all I have had to do is say something and it's taken care of. The donor nurses at the center are really good about listening and addressing concerns, which was crucial in my decision to donate again. I also appreciated the opportunity to participate in a focus group to hear other donors' stories. I think it's important that the donors not feel isolated during this experience. Without the donors, this process wouldn't be possible. Therefore, I really commend the staff for listening to the recommendations made, especially by implementing letters like these from other donors.

We all have different reasons for donating, none of which are more valid or important than any other. For me it was helping others achieve the dream of being a parent. My children have taught me how to love unconditionally. They have taught me patience and helped me learn how to laugh out loud again. They are my life and my heartbeat. I am humbled that I had this opportunity to help someone else know the incredibly amazing gifts that children bring to our lives.

Sharon